Saturday 6 January 2018

ITV's rugby commentators leave New Zealand's for dead. (Oct. 12, 2015)

12 October 2015 at 7:58 pm
Hamish “Biffa” McKay: “Speaking of the French: BRING ‘EM ON!”
ITV’s rugby commentators leave New Zealand’s for dead.
ITV, Television One, TV3, Monday 12 October 2015
Anyone in New Zealand who tuned in to this morning’s superb France-Ireland RWC match in Cardiff will have been impressed by the excellent commentary. The match callers were an Irishman (Geordan Murphy) and an Englishman (Nick Mullins); they were much, much better than what we are, unfortunately, served up from New Zealand match callers. Their comments were sharp, analytical, fair and (best of all) they were not impeded by any lightweights or dead wood like the egregious Ian “Smithy” Smith. Instead, an intelligent and well spoken woman, Maggie Alphonsi, did the sideline comments, actually providing viewers with precise and useful information.
At the end of the match, after Ireland’s stirring victory, Nick Mullins mentioned that France had to come back to Cardiff next Sunday to play the All Blacks. The All Blacks would no doubt be seeking revenge for their 2007 quarter-final loss to France at the same stadium, he said. And then he said something which is almost totally verboten for any New Zealand commentator: it was in fact the Tricolors that would be seeking revenge, after their controversial one-point loss to the All Blacks in the farcical 2011 RWC final.
Such honesty and plain speaking is, of course, absent from the comments of New Zealand sports “experts”. On the Television One sports news this evening, a bleary-eyed and cold Andrew “Sav” Saville, broadcasting live at 6:40 a.m. from Newport, provided a horrible example of the smug misreporting and distortion that are the rule in this country’s rugby reporting….
ANDREW “SAV” SAVILLE: … But all eyes now are on the refereeing appointments for the four quarter-final games. And as we all know, Jenny-May, referees can SOMETIMES have an effect on the outcome of Rugby World Cup quarter-finals! [Chortles and smirks]
JENNY-MAY COFFIN: [in an arch, sing-song tone] Don’t know WHAT you’re getting at there, Saaaav! ….[Cut to Saville smirking, as if trying not to snort out loud]…. But, yes, all eyes on the refereeing appointments!
Shortly after that grotesquerie, I switched the channel, just in time to see Hamish “Biffa” McKay finishing off the TV3 sports news with a defiant flourish….
HAMISH “BIFFA” McKAY: Speaking of the French: BRING ‘EM ON!
……[Awkward pause. McKay’s show of belligerence lapses into an uncertain grimace. Newsreaders Mike McRoberts and Hillary Barry manage to force thin smiles. McRoberts takes a deep breath then speaks as if to an annoying child]….
MIKE McROBERTS: [grimly] All right. It’s going to be a long week, I can see….
  • Macro3.1
    12 October 2015 at 8:15 pm
    Thank god I don’t watch TV ….
  • maui3.2
    12 October 2015 at 8:30 pm
    Might just be me, but it seems like there are twice as many Rugby World Cup stories in the media than last time. You literally can’t breath anymore without inhaling an AB, it’s wall to wall black.
    • Atiawa3.2.1
      12 October 2015 at 9:05 pm
      I’m looking forward to the post mortem. They don’t take up as much time and space as the glory of victory.
    • lprent3.2.2
      13 October 2015 at 7:46 pm
      Do what I do. Don’t watch broadcast TV.
      Who gives a pigs arse for what the damn rugby teams do?
      • maui3.2.2.1
        13 October 2015 at 9:28 pm
        I don’t watch tv that much, but it’s the big national news websites that I’m being gamed by, with stories on celebrity fashion and dogs skateboarding and then it’s all downhill from there.
  • Paul3.3
    12 October 2015 at 9:00 pm
    Same….
  • Instauration3.4
    12 October 2015 at 11:35 pm
    Too many of us invest emotional energy into a sphere where we are benign.
    The typical AB supporter has no influence or control over the outcome of any game – such investment – is just Dumb.
    AB win or lose has nothing to do with most of us.
    Win – we hope to bask in the glory of other peoples achievements – is just Delusional.
    Lose – well !
    Dumb and Deluded – true NZ at its worst !
    • millsy3.4.1
      13 October 2015 at 12:48 am
      The sun will still rise tomorrow if the AB’s lose.
      FWIW — I cannot see them winning this world cup. The energy isnt there.
  • esoteric pineapples3.5
    13 October 2015 at 9:25 am
    The All Blacks – aren’t they the ones that went from being the national team to the National Party team?
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