SCENE: A West Australian sububurban residence. A gorgeous Australian
woman and her moustachioed kiwi husband are watching television and
browsing throgh magazines.
"Peter Ashford" <m...@here.there.com> wrote in message
news:Wir7b.142605$JA5.3454695@
> <drivel snipped>
>
> About 1.5 Breens, and painful for it.
>
> Peter.
>
"Johnno" <joh...@ihatespam.com> wrote in message
news:
"rick boyd" <bo...@comswest.net.au> wrote in message
news:3f607a21.21558729@news.
woman and her moustachioed kiwi husband are watching television and
browsing throgh magazines.
At about ten o'clock, RICK is feeling a bit stressed, so he
surreptitiously books himself in for a massage....
surreptitiously books himself in for a massage....
RICK: [whispering softly into mobile, so wife cannot hear] Make sure she's gorgeous, and make sure she likes kiwis. My name? Uh, um... it's "Kip". Half an hour from now. Okay. Over and out. [Clicks mobile shut, turns to wife] Gotta go out, love. Something's
come up.
come up.
AMANDA: Oh dear! Well, that's too bad. [sweetly] Don't hurry
home.....
home.....
[RICK sidles out of living room, bent double, trying to hide massive
h**d-on, while his wife watches him with expression of suspicion and
amusement. She waits while RICK backs car out of drive, and speeds
off down road. She then opens back door and lets pet RAM into living
room.]
h**d-on, while his wife watches him with expression of suspicion and
amusement. She waits while RICK backs car out of drive, and speeds
off down road. She then opens back door and lets pet RAM into living
room.]
AMANDA: Well, hello, Ernest! I hope you've been eating plenty of
grass. Got to keep your strength up!
grass. Got to keep your strength up!
[ERNEST trots directly into master bedroom. AMANDA puts Rod Stewart's
"Tonight's the Night" on stereo, then follows him...]
"Tonight's the Night" on stereo, then follows him...]
..............................
SCENE: Massage Parlour
[RICK enters the room, wearing nothing but a towel to cover his small
modesty, and waits for the masseuse.]
modesty, and waits for the masseuse.]
When the masseuse enters, she is the most gorgeous, well proportioned
blonde 18 year old he has ever seen. He knows he is going to enjoy
this.
blonde 18 year old he has ever seen. He knows he is going to enjoy
this.
GIRL: [chewing gum as she talks] Hi Kip, I'm Ashleigh. How are you
today?
today?
RICK: [panting] Hi Ashleigh! I'm great!
GIRL: Well, let's begin!
As the GIRL starts to rub him down, RICK begins to feel considerably
aroused, and when he is rolled onto his stomach he sees that he has a
massive b*n*r, and is worried that the GIRL may see it. She continues
to massage, and RICK notices that her young eyes have been drawn to
his growing member. The GIRL leans towards him and whispers
seductively into his ear.
aroused, and when he is rolled onto his stomach he sees that he has a
massive b*n*r, and is worried that the GIRL may see it. She continues
to massage, and RICK notices that her young eyes have been drawn to
his growing member. The GIRL leans towards him and whispers
seductively into his ear.
GIRL: Would you like to "take care" of that?
[RICK is VERY aroused and nods vigorously. The GIRL leaves the room.]
RICK: [muttering excitedly, prancing about naked, an utter galoot,
shameless and enormously er*ct, slobbering like a horse] Oh my GOD!
This is fantastic, I'm going to get jerked off by the most gorgeous
girl I have ever seen! She's probably off putting on a sexy costume or
something.
shameless and enormously er*ct, slobbering like a horse] Oh my GOD!
This is fantastic, I'm going to get jerked off by the most gorgeous
girl I have ever seen! She's probably off putting on a sexy costume or
something.
[Ten minutes pass, and RICK is just as aroused as he was before. The
door opens.]
door opens.]
GIRL: Have you finished yet?
<drivel snipped>
About 1.5 Breens, and painful for it.
Peter.
 |
"Peter Ashford" <m...@here.there.com> wrote in message
news:Wir7b.142605$JA5.3454695@
> <drivel snipped>
>
> About 1.5 Breens, and painful for it.
>
> Peter.
>
It's amazing how common that was in Perth, when I lived there anyway. Blokes
would go straight after work, shocking. Not to mention drinking beer whilst
driving back to the yard as soon as the truck was empty.
Aussies......arf.
would go straight after work, shocking. Not to mention drinking beer whilst
driving back to the yard as soon as the truck was empty.
Aussies......arf.
|
On 9 Sep 2003 10:20:04 -0700, morriss...@yahoo.com (Morrissey
Breen) wrote:
Breen) wrote:
>RICK: [muttering excitedly, prancing about naked, an utter galoot,
>shameless and enormously er*ct, slobbering like a horse] Oh my GOD!
>This is fantastic, I'm going to get jerked off by the most gorgeous
>girl I have ever seen! She's probably off putting on a sexy costume or
>something.
>
>[Ten minutes pass, and RICK is just as aroused as he was before. The
>door opens.]
>
>GIRL: Have you finished yet?
>shameless and enormously er*ct, slobbering like a horse] Oh my GOD!
>This is fantastic, I'm going to get jerked off by the most gorgeous
>girl I have ever seen! She's probably off putting on a sexy costume or
>something.
>
>[Ten minutes pass, and RICK is just as aroused as he was before. The
>door opens.]
>
>GIRL: Have you finished yet?
Right. That little fantasy transcription is mildly disturbing.
Somewhere buried in cyberspace is a anonymous hack conjuring up
homo-erotic fantasies with a driving need to share said fantasies.
Somewhere buried in cyberspace is a anonymous hack conjuring up
homo-erotic fantasies with a driving need to share said fantasies.
Why can't these burgeoning fags 'come out' without out having to force
their affliction on everyone else? WHat is the deal with that?
their affliction on everyone else? WHat is the deal with that?
So you're a fudge packer Breen? a poo-pusher, a dirty Darlinghurst
wall walker. Why the fuck can't you just keep your sad, corrupt
existence within the narrowing confines of your own brain.
wall walker. Why the fuck can't you just keep your sad, corrupt
existence within the narrowing confines of your own brain.
|
>snipped madness
good god you have problems man.....
cheers,
Bryan Ray
Bryan Ray
|
Peter Ashford <m...@here.there.com> wrote in message news:<Wir7b.142605$JA5.
> <drivel snipped>
>
> About 1.5 Breens, and painful for it.
>
> Peter.
>
> About 1.5 Breens, and painful for it.
>
> Peter.
Only 1.5? Who the hell do you think you are: Frank freaking RICH?
|
Morrissey Breen wrote:
- show quoted text -
As an advisor to the Breen scale creation comittee, I have to inform you
that the judge's decision is final and no correspondence will be entered
into.
that the judge's decision is final and no correspondence will be entered
into.
As an asiide, your presumptious affectation of assuming the name of the
annoying post scale as your sirname does not impress the judges nor help
your case in any way.
annoying post scale as your sirname does not impress the judges nor help
your case in any way.
Yours sincerly
The Judge.
|
Peter Ashford <m...@here.there.com> wrote in
news:1ZM7b.143679$JA5.3...@
- show quoted text -
I thought, sorry - start again, this writer, moi methinks(sic) you got
extra marks for presumptious affectation.
extra marks for presumptious affectation.
|
"Johnno" <joh...@ihatespam.com> wrote in message
news:
> I thought, sorry - start again, this writer, moi methinks(sic) you got
> extra marks for presumptious affectation.
> extra marks for presumptious affectation.
This writer (moi) thinks that it's '(sic!)'.
EXCLAMATION MARKS MAKE THINGS BETTER.
Can the Morrisssey Breen drinking game be far behind?
Cheers
Brent
On Wed, 10 Sep 2003 23:25:30 +0100, "Brent" <the_...@hotmail.com>
wrote:
>Can the Morrisssey Breen drinking game be far behind?
wrote:
>Can the Morrisssey Breen drinking game be far behind?
He's enough to drive anyone to drink. His banal drivel would send a
saint dashing for the nearest early opener. I just can't read more
than a couple of lines -- even when it's about me! And I would have
thought that was impossible until the advent of Breenis.
saint dashing for the nearest early opener. I just can't read more
than a couple of lines -- even when it's about me! And I would have
thought that was impossible until the advent of Breenis.
But at least he affords some small amusement. I get a chuckle from the
mental picture of this lonely little reject of life, glued to his
computer keyboard and his transistor radio, typing out his little
screenplays with rapt determination, absolutely convinced in his own
mind that everyone pores over every single word.
mental picture of this lonely little reject of life, glued to his
computer keyboard and his transistor radio, typing out his little
screenplays with rapt determination, absolutely convinced in his own
mind that everyone pores over every single word.
And even the target of his marshmellow barbs can't be buggered wading
through more than a few lines of his turgid verbosity. Quite funny in
a deeply tragic sort of way.
through more than a few lines of his turgid verbosity. Quite funny in
a deeply tragic sort of way.
-- rick boyd
|
bo...@comswest.net.au (rick boyd) wrote in message news:<3f607a21...@news.
matron saying the same thing not so long ago....
>
> I just can't read more
> than a couple of lines -- even when it's about me!
Hmmmm... methinks someone is telling "Milwaukees"....> I just can't read more
> than a couple of lines -- even when it's about me!
>
> But at least he affords some small amusement.
Funnily enough, this writer recalls a rather lovely West Australian> But at least he affords some small amusement.
matron saying the same thing not so long ago....
>
> I get a chuckle from the
> mental picture of this lonely little reject of life, glued to his
> computer keyboard and his transistor radio, typing out his little
> screenplays with rapt determination,
Jesus H. Christ! He's captured moi perfectly! > I get a chuckle from the
> mental picture of this lonely little reject of life, glued to his
> computer keyboard and his transistor radio, typing out his little
> screenplays with rapt determination,
.... <Snip bilious raving by sad fellow in serious denial >....
9/12/03
|
9/12/03
|
|
"rick boyd" <bo...@comswest.net.au> wrote in message
news:3f607a21.21558729@news.
- show quoted text -
I'd have thought anythiing that was banal on here would be drivel. You've
just stated something which is obviously implicit.
Therefore I sentance you to...........support New Zealand, harr harr.
/that got him....
just stated something which is obviously implicit.
Therefore I sentance you to...........support New Zealand, harr harr.
/that got him....
|
That humour-free zone "Ben L" <bjlongm...@hotmail.com> blithered
his support for the struggling Rick Boyd in message
news:<bjqatr$ltg6j$1...@ID-
asserting" anything. What has been established "pretty clearly",
however, is that the concept of exposition, building a case and wit
are foreign to this Ben L fellow.
his support for the struggling Rick Boyd in message
news:<bjqatr$ltg6j$1...@ID-
>
> I don't think he's denying you write banal drivel.
> I don't think he's denying you write banal drivel.
Errrrr, all drivel is banal, surely. (Not only humour-free, but
illiterate.)
illiterate.)
>
> On the contrary, he's asserted it pretty clearly.
No, I don't think so. Merely calling someone names is not "clearly> On the contrary, he's asserted it pretty clearly.
asserting" anything. What has been established "pretty clearly",
however, is that the concept of exposition, building a case and wit
are foreign to this Ben L fellow.
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