Good riddance to New Zealand’s Biggest Bogans
by E. KERR McROVI, The N.Z. Gerald, Sunday 20 January 2019
by E. KERR McROVI, The N.Z. Gerald, Sunday 20 January 2019
You would have to wonder what this country’s Biggest Bogans were doing when they chose the New Zealand taxpayer to fund their calumny from 2008 until we gave them the arse in 2017.
Did they think we were complete saps, willing to roll over and accept their appalling anti-social and criminal behaviour? That we were too primitive and unsophisticated to galvanise ourselves into a posse of right-thinking community policemen and women? A little bit of homework would have shown that we have spectacularly good form in bringing down even highly trained criminals, far less amateurs.
But just to recap … That bunch of foul mouthed, bribe-taking, snitching, backstabbing, housing expenses-rorting, cigar smoke-blowing, hairpulling louts made headlines on a daily – nay, hourly – basis. Since award-winning journalist Nicky Hager exposed to the nation in 2014 that their leader had allowed his office to be the command centre for an illegal, secret campaign of character assassination and vilification run by the infamous and disgusting Cameron FailAll Slater, assisted incompetently and pathetically by his stumble-tongued slave Jordan Williams, this gang of reprobates ran our country’s reputation into the ground with the same lack of concern as their dirty dairy friends foul the water the rest of us used to drink and swim in.
The gang of thugs parked up at the Beehive for nine terrible years quickly drew the attention of Kiwis thanks to their filthy language and their filthy behaviour. [1] When a local woman suffering from asthma asked one of them to stop smoking a cigar in their enclosed box at a football match, the feral fellow turned particularly nasty. Instead of ceasing to smoke, he walked up to the woman and blew smoke in her face. This led to the woman’s husband nearly knocking Coleman’s brains out. [2] And thus it began.
As a result of the publicity over the cigar fracas, a number of people approached theHerald with their own horror stories of encountering the nation’s Biggest Bogans.
A man who had the great misfortune to share a flight with one of these appalling humans recounted his bad behaviour at Christchurch Airport in 2014. It was hours of misery for everyone involved, when the fattest and most unpleasant of all the Bogans bumptiously bypassed security to board a domestic flight. He was fined $2,000 for that bit of idiocy. [3]
Next, a young waitress from Parnell came forward to complain about the leader of the Unruly Gang. She recognised the lout from his many appearances in the media and told how he and his people had come to her cafe and repeatedly pulled her hair while his wife just watched. [4]
Another of these antisocial and repulsive pests was caught by one of our leading artists in the act of befouling our waterways, along with his horrid dirty dairying amigos. [5]
This Unruly, Unholy Mob had no idea just how effective New Zealanders can be at monitoring aberrant behaviour. Those of us who are honest will remember that the gangsters who ran that vicious and secret campaign of character assassination from Wonky John’s office were exposed not by this country’s counter espionage agents or even our investigative police officers. The hapless bumbling tossers in charge of the operation were exposed thanks to a concerned computer expert (“Rawshark”) who had clocked a number of odd incidents and reported them to the renowned journalist Nicky Hager.
So this group of professional louts never had a chance of slipping under the radar. The reaction to these no-hopers was an excellent example of what can happen when we work together.
