Thursday, 30 May 2019

Scott York: “Ummm, ahhhh, I dunno. Ummm…” (Apr. 4, 2013)

    • “Ummm, ahhhh, I dunno. Ummm…”
      Umperator Fish fails to perform

      The Panel, Radio NZ National, Thursday 4 April 2013
      Jim Mora, Jock Anderson, Scott York
      This government is on the ropes. Scandal after scandal has left its major asset, the affable John Key, looking tired, harried and confused. His inability to tell lies convincingly has been embarrassingly exposed with the Ian Fletcher/GCSB scandal; for the first time, Key has been faced with relentless and concerted questions from journalists, who can sense blood.
      Regular listeners to the Panel will know that, almost always, at least one of the two guest Panelists will be a right winger and reflexively a Key supporter, and that the host (usually Jim Mora) will almost always support that right winger. So the program is usually stacked against the liberal or left voice, if there happens to be one that day.
      However, as has been shown by the likes of Gordon CampbellAnna ChinnBomber Bradbury and Gordon McLauchlan, one liberal voice having the gumption to challenge the indolent and poorly thought out assertions of right wingers can be extremely effective.
      So it would be enormously damaging to the Government, and enormously helpful for the rest of us, if an articulate person went on National Radio’s Panel show and simply restated the facts of this scandal, eloquently and courageously.
      Unfortunately, though, the representative for the liberal left today was one Scott York….
      JIM MORA: First topic today is, unsurprisingly, the Ian Fletcher/GCSB scandal. John Key has had ANOTHER memory lapse; how damaging could this one be for the Government?
      SCOTT YORK: I, uh, dunno. You know, uhhh, the Labour government had its problems too, with Clare Curran. But ummmm, I dunno. Yeah, I guess….
      JOCK ANDERSON: This is a story that has been promulgated by twenty-five wild-eyed journalists.
      JIM MORA: John Armstrong from the New Zealand Herald joins us. John, is Jock Anderson correct when he says it’s just twenty-five wild-eyed journalists that are pushing this story?
      JOHN ARMSTRONG: [speaking slowly to indicate great seriousness] It’s a bit wider than that, but not much.
      JIM MORA: So you think it’s a bit too much to suggest there is a danger of oligarchy in this country? Thats too long a bow to draw.
      JOHN ARMSTRONG: Yes, but this is corrosive. This will worry the National Party hierarchy.
      MORA: It sounds impulsive what he did, saying “I’ll pick up the phone and ring the guy.” So this will not hurt John Key. As we said yesterday, people will say this is the way the world works. It will not hurt John Key will it.
      ARMSTRONG: It doesn’t go far beyond the Beltway.
      JOCK ANDERSON: As Rob Hosking said in the NBR, this is only of concern to the Bowen Triangle, which is the Wellington equivalent of the Bermuda Triangle!
      MORA: Ha ha ha ha ha! John Armstrong on the Panel! Ha ha ha ha ha!
      Topic 2: The Census…
      Jock Anderson spends several minutes boasting about how he did not fill out his census form. Then Jim Mora decides it’s time to turn into Mr. Nasty, except he doesn’t do it with much conviction….
      JIM MORA: Carol Slappendel is the General Manager of the 2013 Census. She joins us now. I see you are still allowing people to fill in their census forms more than a month late. Shouldn’t we call it the March-April census and dispense with the urgency of the night?
      CAROL SLAPPENDEL: Actually, the completion rate has been exceptionally good. And there has been a very high number of people doing it online.
      MORA: [skeptically] Yeah. Can I ask you about that? How did it go in Oamaru where participating online was ENCOURAGED?
      CAROL SLAPPENDEL: Very well, actually.
      MORA: Carol Slappendel, thank you. It’s 4:30, time for the news.
      ….4:30 News and Weather….
      JIM MORA: Time for the Soapbox. What’s been on your mind, Scott?
      SCOTT YORK Ummm, I’d like to give a bit of a plug for a new website. Ummm, it’s a satirical site called The Civilian.
      JIM MORA: The Civilian?
      SCOTT YORK: Yes. Some say it’s a Kiwi equivalent of the Onion.
      JIM MORA: It’s nice to see a blog with a sense of humor, isn’t it. Some of these political sites have no sense of humor.
      SCOTT YORK: Yeah! Ummmm. Yeah.
      JIM MORA: Good luck to them! Jock what’s been on YOUR mind?
      JOCK ANDERSON: Well, this is something I complained about on this program a few weeks ago, and that is the way that Len Brown’s Auckland Council keeps shutting its citizens out on the weekends. I object to the Auckland Council closing down the city centre for these events all the time. Last weekend Queen Street was closed for a wild-eyed bunch of sweaty zealots racing in the Golden Mile.
      MORA: Ummm, thank you, ummmm, Jock. I’d like to move onto North Korea. THAT’s a serious topic. The state’s warlike rhetoric follows the recently imposed U.N. sanctions. Are you getting a bit worried now?
      JOCK ANDERSON: I am.
      JIM MORA: Just before we get Professor Al Gillespie, Scott, your thoughts.
      SCOTT YORK: Ummm, North Korea is such an odd country, ummmmm, cut off from the rest of the world. We’ve got a new, inexperienced North Korean leader, ummmmm, next thing you know, ummmm, it’s World War Three.
      JIM MORA: Are we right to be nervous, do you think, Al?
      AL GILLESPIE: America is being particularly belligerent at this point.
      JOCK ANDERSON: Are there any similarities to the Cuban missile crisis?
      [This discussion continues for a further few minutes, then the music starts to swell, signalling the impending end of the show…]
      MORA: Just before we go, your thoughts on the Christchurch Cathedral?
      SCOTT YORK: Ummm, ahhhh, I dunno. Ummm.
      MORA: It’s five o’clock. Gotta go!
      • Tigger2.1
        Who the fuck is Scott York? Speaking of satire…you made this up, yes? I mean, this is just crazy sauce.
        • Professor Longhair2.1.1
          Unfortunately, he has not made any of it up. I heard the broadcast, and that is a pretty accurate transcript.
          • Lanthanide2.1.1.1
            No it’s not. He gives the impression that talking to Carol Slappendel took all of 2 minutes, but it was much much longer than that.
            Which means so far, every single transcript of Morrissey’s that I’ve read where I had actually heard the interview itself, he has mischaracterised in some way. So I don’t trust anything he writes any more.
            • fender2.1.1.1.1
              You might have a poor reception down there Lanth, I listen to ‘the panel’ most days and when Morrissey reports on it he gets it 99.9% correct 99.9% of the time.
              With regard to the Carol Slappendel segment he did omit the tired ramblings of Jock Anderson who tried to put listeners asleep with his paranoid recollections of avoiding filling out census forms (he must have much to hide).
              I always enjoy Morrissey reporting on ‘the panel’ farce and find his version matches what I have heard.
              p.s. Scott York is a bit of a smelly fish.
              • Lanthanide2.1.1.1.1.1
                “You might have a poor reception down there Lanth, I listen to ‘the panel’ most days and when Morrissey reports on it he gets it 99.9% correct 99.9% of the time.”
                No, all I’ve said is that every single transcript for which I’ve read that I had also heard the actual interview at the very least mischaracterised what went on, if not completely changed the works spoken so as to not be a transcript at all.
                Note that that is a sample of about 4. But 4 out of 4 is not good.
                “With regard to the Carol Slappendel segment he did omit the tired ramblings of Jock Anderson”
                Um, no, he omitted many question and answer responses from Carol. Perhaps you need to check your reception.
            • Morrissey2.1.1.1.2
              No it’s not.
              Yes it is, and you know it is, just as you knew my rush transcript of Hekia Parata’s embarrassingly inept interview back in August 2011 was accurate….
              He gives the impression that talking to Carol Slappendel took all of 2 minutes, but it was much much longer than that.
              I think any intelligent reader would realise that I had not included everythingthese people said on the programme. My purpose is of course to capture something of the pervading tone of shallowness and flippancy. My approach is little different from the great Tom Frewen’s legendary Today in Parliament—which can still, by the way, be heard on Community Radio stations.
              Which means so far, every single transcript of Morrissey’s that I’ve read where I had actually heard the interview itself, he has mischaracterised in some way.
              I have mischaracterised nothing. In the transcript that heads this thread, I have endeavoured to capture at least a hint of the essential nastiness of Jock Anderson, the refusal to be serious of Jim Mora, and the timidity and mealy-mouthedness of Scott York. You are trying to say that is not a valid approach, and that every single thing they say should have been included. That’s nonsense.
              So I don’t trust anything he writes any more.
              In March 2011 you trusted the demonstrable lies of the Japanese government and you trusted the integrity of the Air New Zealand CEO Rob Fyfe when he came on television to insist there was “absolutely no danger” from radiation around Tokyo. I’ll leave it to readers to decide whether they trust YOUR judgement.
              • QoT2.1.1.1.2.1
                I think everyone on this thread frankly needs to google the definition of “transcript”.
              • Lanthanide2.1.1.1.2.2
                “Yes it is, and you know it is, just as you knew my rush transcript of Hekia Parata’s embarrassingly inept interview back in August 2011 was accurate….
                http://thestandard.org.nz/open-mike-30082011/#comment-369467
                Sorry, I don’t “know it” because what you have produced and claimed to be a transcript, is, to borrow one of your words, “demonstrably” not a transcript.
                “I think any intelligent reader would realise that I had not included everything these people said on the programme. ”
                No, any intelligent reader who reads something that purports to be a transcript would expect it to be a transcript. There is absolutely nothing in your post that suggests the sections that show dialogue are not actually the complete dialogue that was spoken. All you need to do is put “…” in there or “later” or anything, but you deliberately choose not to do so.
                “I have mischaracterised nothing. In the transcript that heads this thread, I have endeavoured to capture at least a hint of the essential nastiness of Jock Anderson, the refusal to be serious of Jim Mora, and the timidity and mealy-mouthedness of Scott York. You are trying to say that is not a valid approach, and that every single thing they say should have been included. That’s nonsense.”
                You mischaracterised the interview with Carol Slappendel by making it look like Mora had her on for less than a minute to ask her one question and then bid her off. That DID NOT HAPPEN and so you are mischaracterising what did happen. It really is very straight forward.
                “In March 2011 you trusted the demonstrable lies of the Japanese government and you trusted the integrity of the Air New Zealand CEO Rob Fyfe when he came on television to insist there was “absolutely no danger” from radiation around Tokyo. I’ll leave it to readers to decide whether they trust YOUR judgement.”
                Sure, I’ve no problem with that. All you have to do is show that the people flying in those flights to Japan have somehow gone on to suffer ill health effects. Then you might actually have some evidence.
      • Dr Terry2.2
        Regrettably not only Key but his supporters too clearly have severe and regular lapses in memory.
    • Just a thought, the massive pay increases to the Mighty River Power directors is a more important issue than Key’s bastardising the process to have his mate appointed as head of the GCSB.
      The second issue certainly has raised considerable concerns about his honesty but the first issue shows the never ending process whereby the rich get more and the poor and workers get less.
      Out in middle New Zealand I think many will find the nuances of the Fletcher issue too difficult to comprehend whereas the greed shown by the MRP directors is clear to see.
      • Coronial Typer3.2
        Even Key’s stuff-ups on sideshow stories protect him from the bigger stories; GCSB beltway oddity covers New Zealand’s largest single pending industrial closure, and also smothers the big MRP prospectus launch together with price range. He may go down in history for nothing except being our luckiest PM.
      • BM3.3
        True, no one gives a toss about “the process”.
        Key rung his mate,big deal.
        It’s widely accepted, that it’s who you know, not what you know when it comes to getting a job, people don’t have an issue with that, it’s just the way the world works.
        Power prices though, that irks people.

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